Profile
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| User: | kragey (849661) ----Breaking Point----
¯¯¯the journal of¯¯¯kragey mitchell¯¯¯ |
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| Name: | Kragey Mitchell | |
| Website: | Celestial | |
| Location: | Pennsylvania, United States | |
| Birthdate: | 04-18 | |
| Bio: | I write. I Photoshop. I do webdesign. Being a teenager blows big time. ----------------------------------------------- "OH! BANANAS! Hitomi read somewhere in the manual that says 'do not use bananas to make juice, for bananas do not make juices'." --Snuzzmuffin "My vagina hurts from all the cookies." --R. Struc "I could be a horrible deformed penguin/walrus hybrid bent on the destruction of your left sock." --PK TamTu: "I DO BELIEVE IN FAERIES. I DO. I DO." Kragey: "Fuck the faeries." "You have a nice vagina!" --Akky Bo Jonses Kragey: You know what a cool word is? FORK. Snuzzmuffin: FORK adj. or noun? Kragey: Noun. Wait...it can be an adj? Snuzzmuffin: make "fork" into a verb! and "that's so forked up" "Do all daddys have boobs?" --The non-existent son of Nanu x Kragey love "Awesome possum, little Krageling." --Keeko "Hey Kragey, are you flaccid right now?" --Nanu "Let's go fire up some English muffins and beat your dog." --American Choppers "Why did the chicken cross the road? But seriously, you are looking beautiful today, and may I suggest we adjourn and spontaneously give thanks to God while I empathize with your inner woman in private, if indeed you'd consent to receive the fervent attentions of my lowly self? And afterward, we could go to Disneyworld." --Unknown Byron: I thought you'd given up the internet to become a nun! Kragey: Me? Nun? HAHAHA. Oh, that's a fucking QUOTE. ::copies:: Byron: Oh, not the NUN kind. I meant more the, you know, other kind. With the stockings. Kragey: Oh! Well, no. The stockings aren't so comfortable after an hour or so. And the dental plan SUCKS. Byron: They won't even give you regular examinations? Kragey: No! Once every two years they pay for HALF. It's atrocious. Byron: That is disgusting. If it were up to me, I would give you all expense paid examinations whenever you wanted. That is ridiculous. Kragey: Yes, but you'd be getting fringe benefits. The employers were all pastey women with no hips. "I can go for seconds without talking about sex! Did I say seconds? I meant minutes! Hours, even! Hours of sex! DAMN!" --Byron "Hahaha, I love the harpsichord though. I guess it's mostly because I think of the baroque era, history, and romantic things like that. Go harpsichord! I bet, in those times, everyone was having sex on top of their harpsichords. They were all like, "Damn this thing turns me on! *takes wife* Lets pump it on top of it!" --Velvetine Rabbit K's away message: Mippy, if you IM me instead of spending time with your w00bie, I will hunt you down and spoon out your eyeballs with pixie sticks. Mippy: He got offline, dummy. Kragey: ...puh. "Why don't you just put a buncha rainbow anuses up there and write: "My rectum burns with overwhelming fire" is love?" -- ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} ware's supah-sekrit frend!"You almost make forget about TACOS! TACOS! Yummy yummy yummy in my tummy!" --South Park "When come back, bring pie!" --Weebl n' Bob "The only way I can motivate myself is by playing with pretzels." --Mark L. Jen: "Gay people just aren't NATURAL." Kragey: "Well, if God sends the gays to Hell, I'd hate to see who does the hair styling in Heaven." "I think I got you addicted to grandma." TOM: "UGANDA!" KRAGEY: "You still haven't told me what that's about." TOM: "It's a country with a funny name." KRAGEY: "And you just yell it out randomly?" TOM: "Hell yeah, it's funny." KRAGEY: "So if I ran around yelling 'SIBERIA!', would it have the same effect?" TOM: "God, yes, but you'd be a poser for copying me." "Ohmygawd, I'm gonna be 18 in 3 days! Sexual peak!" --Tommy D Paul: "It actually flys like a birdy. Why, is it, like, flickering?" Kragey: "What? Paul, please don't talk about your radioactive penis. Now is not the time." Doug: "I've seen batteries bigger than Jim's penis!" Paul: "Why do you think they call them 'SlimJims'?" Andy: "Why do some of these animal crackers have white frosting and the other ones have pink?" Kragey: "The pink ones are the girls." Doug: ::spits water everywhere:: "Vendui, surfacer!" --Jase "Tea and cake or death, tea and cake or death, little red cookbook, little red cookbook!" "Never put a sock in a toaster." "I like my women like I like my coffee: in a plastic cup." "What exactly is an evil giraffe?...'I have eatten all the leaves off the trees. I have gotten up early to eat all the leaves off the trees, so when the other giraffes wake up there will be no leaves...AND THEY WILL DIE." "...and Simon, God of hairdos..." "I want to get the whole of the Gobi Desert in to a rat!" "Control! P! Print!" "Fuck off, I'm the queen!" "If a girl falls in heels, that's bad, but if a bloke does it, you've got to kill yourself." "Ciaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaao." "Whereas you say 'erbs,' we say 'herbs'...because there's a fucking H in it." "Thank you for flying church of England, cake or death?" "Cause my Gran said, 'Put a thimble on your finger, and it helps you, in case you slip with a needle, the needle goes up, and into brain, and death!' And before thimbles were invented, it was 'Needle death! Tragic! Whole family! Family of sewers! Tragic!'" "Hello, I am French. I am here to sleep with your family." "I am a canal." --Eddie Izzard "It's GORGEOUS outside! If outside were a man, I'd suck it off today." --Keeko Kragey: [calls Chach] Hello? Jon: asjf89wn892ngh8924hf89234hg7h Kragey: ...helloooo?! Jon: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Kragey: OhmyGod, you little bitch, FUCK. YOU. Jon: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Kragey: Are you high? Jon: [REALLY serious] I wish. "I'll poop in your mouth! Then you'll REALLY be talkin' shit!" --Josh "I'm a psychopath, but we all know that! Woo-ooo!" ::penis pose:: --Chach Capo: "Sarah looks straaaaaaaange...oh so strange...STRAAAAANGE!" Kragey: "I SAID STRAINED! LIKE...strained noodles." Capo: "TOP RAMEN." "This is the archtype of the Garden of Eden, years before the Magdalene, but it's the garden of Original Sin-suality, where Eve ate not of the apple but of the Strawberry, and that's my moment of darkness...when you're watching from the aeroplane and there's Puss In Boots on the sidelines with a glass of wine, and that's the type of women I sing about, the Eves and the Magdalenes with the strawberries, chained to the wrists, and that's the heart of the song, that's the core, and that's where you can smell the Hilter... he's sweeter than Mussolini, but spicier than Pol Pot." -- sweetserene"Double moistage!" "I like setting things on fire. FIRE FIRE FIRE!" "LOLLERCAUST." "I'll just go over to his house, ring the doorbell, kick him in the crotch and run away." "I just googled 'blow-up sheep'." "There is no emoticon to describe how hard I'm laughing right now." "WHERE'S FDR AND HIS FUN-SUCKING WHEELCHAIRS WHEN YOU NEED THEM?!" "There's a fucking huge cow outside of Oak Park Mall giving free ice cream." --Jason "If you were gay, fat, and ugly, do you really think I'd be sitting here trying to finger you?" --Kirby "Oh my God! Candle mode! You just can't beat candle mode." "We need a vacation to Amsterdam." "I am warm with hugs!" "Ohmygawd, what if it's, like, a badger?!" --Liz "Thenardier was...sexually abused. By a preacher. And he's gay. Yes, gay. Very, very gay." "Henderson puked." "THEY'RE DOING LOVELY LADIES AGAIN." "I have whack-a-mole claustraphobia." "I finally get to do something that's not crawling around in a whack-a-mole hole!" "Oooo, it's me!" "I ripped the edge! Why, God, why?!" "We Christians love sex humor, too." "Jeepers! Jeepers! Don't say my Lord's name in vain! JEEPERS! JEEPERS!" "Ohmygawd, JEEPERS?!" "I'm sorry. I suck." "I'm gonna pull a Javert!" "She said she liked being a whore." "Jesus is back in!" "Picture two guys kissing when you listen to this." "I should just have sex with someone in an old folk's home. That could count as community service hours." --Matt "SOMEBODY JUST HUGGED ME IN A LETTER. I FEEL SO HOT." "Wow, I have the memory of a dead ferret." --Leishanda "I don't think she's a lesbian, I think she just ran out of men." "I'm tired of being married to your penis. I'm a person! And this is supposed to be a relationship! And I am DONE walking on eggshells. Ooooooo, don't talk about moving in, in front of the penis cause it might go soft. And, and the penis likes this and the penis doesn't like that and THE PENIS WANTS TO BE MEASURED!" "A finger is the equivalent to about 1/3 of a dick." Those flowers were supposed to say, "We're so sorry. We love you.' Not, 'You're dead, let's disco.'" "People have sex in Connecticut?" Charlotte: "Is it safe to buy pot from strangers?" Miranda: "They're not strangers, they're our new friends with pot!" "You can't be friends with a squirrel! A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit." "I'm a trysexual...I'll try anything once." Charlotte: "How can you forget a guy you've slept with?" Carrie: "Toto, I don't think we're in single-digits anymore." "When I moved to this neighborhood, the only thing that cost twenty dollars was a hand job from a tranny." "I have a date with a dildo." [hungover] "My hair hurts." "You've got to get online, honey. If only for the porn." "Swear on Chanel." "I used to masturbate to a busboy who was rude to me once. What do you think that means?...all right. The cheese stands alone." "Can we cut the cake? I have to get to a three-way." "Money is power, sex is power, therefore, getting money for sex is simply an exchange of power." "One woman's pornographer is another woman's spiritual leader." Stanford: "I can only stay a few minutes. I got tickets to the Vagina Monologues." Carrie: "Why?" Stanford: "Just because I don't eat at the restaurant doesn't mean I can't hear the specials." "Sometimes it's really hard to walk in a single woman's shoes. That's why we need really special ones now and then to make the walk a little more fun." "The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous." "You've slept with 8 men and we're still on appetizers." "I masturbated to my priest." "My vagina's depressed." "No, not white, I told you, nothing that says virginal. I have a child. The jig is up." --Sex and the City "I'M TOO ANGSTY FOR COOKIES." "You smell like sandwich." "I don't entirely wish for a shark to eat off your face." HARRY: "I WILL SUFFOCATE YOU WITH THIS PILLOW...as soon as I finish embroidering it." DEAN: "I'll wait." "Babies come from mail-order." HERMIONE: "I'm already on Neville's ADD meds." RON: "Isn't that unethical?" HERMIONE: "What's unethical is YOU ALL UP IN MY GRILL." RON: "...sorry." HERMIONE: "YEAH YOU SHOULD BE." "WE'RE ALL ABOUT TO BE FUCKED UP THE ASS BY SENOR VOL D. MORT!" "Not now, honey; Mommy's jazzercising." "The hiiiiiills are aliiiiiiiive with the sound of eeeeeeeeeevil! I will rule the wooooooooorld for a thooooousand yeeeeeeeears! The hills fill my heart with the sound of eeeeeeeeeeevil!" "That's a great picture of you. Your head looks kinda like a melon." "When it says embrace, do I actually have to touch them, or is it metaphorical?" "One hundred squillion points from Gryffindor." "Evil is no longer on the cirriculum." PANSY: "You could be evil during lunch or dinner." DRACO: "I can't be evil when I eat. I get indigestion." RON: "What's up?" HARRY: "Nothing. EXCEPT FOR EVERYTHING GOING DICK OVER PINEAPPLE." "WHAT IF YOU HAD A BABY? JESUS FUCK, DO YOU REALIZE WHAT IT WOULD LOOK LIKE? IT WOULD LOOK LIKE A FUCKING KANGAROO SOMEONE SET ON FIRE. I HONESTLY THINK YOU WOULD GIVE BIRTH TO THE ANTICHRIST. I WILL PAY FOR YOUR ABORTION. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, THE SCHOOL WOULD HOLD A BAKESALE! I WOULD MAKE CUPCAKSE. ANTI-GREASLYWANGER CUPCAKES." "I have some very attractive posing pouches for you to wear." -- fiercelikelion"Anakin...did the Jedis touch you?" "Darth. Please turn off your helmet's iTunes when I'm talking to you." SITH: "Save your wife." ANAKIN: "Mmmmm..." SITH: "Phenomenal cosmic power." ANAKIN: "Mmmmm..." SITH: "...red lightsabre?" ANAKING: "OMG, SIGN ME UP!" ANAKIN: "I killed them all! Women, children...KITTENS! And I liked it. ::sob!::" PADME: "...omg, do me." "GOR." -- iharthdarth"Dude, I'll fucking Paypal you $10 to go see gay cowboys. That's as American as apple pie, yo." --Espy "I'm the Dear Abby of misguided youth." -- sugarpuss----------------------------------------------- FANLISTINGS 100x50                100x35          50x50                        -----------------------------------------------  My current layout is Hatsumomo from Memoirs of a Geisha, portrayed by Gong Li. | |
| Memories: | 45 entries | |
| Interests: | 133: accoustic guitar, acting, adobe photoshop, advanced dungeons and dragons, alice walker, anne sexton, any sexuality, aqua teen hunger force, art, audrey hepburn, battlenet, beads, being one with yourself, big macs, bisexuality, bjork, björk, broadway music, brushes, buying bells for her, candy, caramel, carparts bottles cutlery, cats, celtic music, chicken, chocolate, clark gable, clavichord, clay aiken, comedy, cornflake girls, creating music, crime, d&d, dan radcliffe, daniel radcliffe, dante, diablo, diablo 2, diablo ii, dragons, dungeon mistress, dungeons and dragons, dxm, elizabeth taylor, every time it rains, evocative music, eyeliner, fake eyelashes, false eyelashes, family guy, fanfiction, food, frank sinatra, frylock, gays, geisha, ghosts, gloomy sunday, graphics, gypsies, h/d, hair, harpsichord, harry potter, harry/draco, health food, herbal tea, heterosexuality, homosexuality, honeycomb boys, icons, insanity, jack the ripper, junk food, language, lesbians, lipstick, lollipops, lord of the rings, lyrics, make-up, marijuana, marilyn monroe, master shake, meatwad, monty python, music, musical theater, musicals, natalie wood, neil gaiman, neverwinter nights, new age, noodles, on demand, pepper mcgowan, photography, piano, playing instruments, pr0n, ps6, rainbow colored cereal, rammstein, reading, rhodes, sarah mclachlan, sarah slean, serial killers, sexy losers, showtunes, singing, slash, smut, spiderman, spirits, stephen king, supernatural, sylvia plath, tea, teaching, the legend of zelda, the sandman, tila nguyen, tom felton, tori amos, upside down, vintage, voice acting, wigs, writing, ♪ | |
| Schools: | None listed | |
| Friends: | ||
| Friend of: | 120: __feedthenight, _myowndecember_, a1mfw, ad_raheem, akurah, amaraine, ambyleigh, amorousloathe, angelinamoon, anniexchrist, anntalla, beehner, bitter_, blueskysandpain, boobsperiment, cassie_kun, celena_chan, chach_a_lot, chibisenshi, chris02569, chuu, cnagy, cooling_girl, crissem, danaeaphreal, dartini, daughterlucifer, deliriumdream, demonicyoshi, disengaged212, dreamchaser016, dystropia, elf_shadow, elf_wench, elfgirlmchan, etienneetmireil, evergreen_t, fiercelikelion, fiercerose, flairea, go0dbyeforever, goldenfirewings, harryp0tter, himitsunatsume, holy_smokes, imperfectlyblue, innaig, janeprosper, junkiepants, kaleidoskope, kannonshrigen, karasuu, katja84, kimbolina, lifeisnothere, littlebluegrrl, lolandorder, lucid_kitten, luciusmalfoy, luckysafire, madcow_spice, magnetandsteel, mallie_monster, masahiko, matt_alan, matt_cruea, melanna, miao0726, middlerelief, mstweak, nikki_wright, nonsensical_fae, nyssane, odangoatama, omahdon, omega_vanguard, papertigress, pateo, pearlsforbuddha, pelegirl99, pianoscry, pikachuu, pinwheeled, queeniemusic, rainpixel, ratinacage420, ryokrea, sadsiren, samiam2905, serephina_belli, sikatrixie, siln, sittolytic, stephano, stormtears, sugarpuss, sunlightlotus, supersam4488, sydstar, tacofreek, tael87, tamtu, thekillinghand, theloversend, thisredrock, tinderboxheart, tmmr, tristan_vigar, velvy, venus_orbiting, ware, widemouthfrog, wodqman730, xloveisagun, xxj_babi_grlxx, yami_no_kitsune, ydocnameloc, yukipon, yumrecs, zombiepianist | |
| Member of: | 21: bakebakebake, boyskissing, brokeback_icons, brush_location, cap_it, capitrequests, devialicious, gayteens, geisha_girls, girlskissing, lesmiz, sextips, shannon_kringen, slashiet, suckitupdyke, tblsurvivors, thewhitetomb, thirteen_, toriamos, vaginapagina, yaoi_daily | |
| Account type: | Basic Account | |
